A Season of Growth: My First Year Coaching High School Rugby

When I made the decision to play for the Banshees and move to Boston for the 2025 WER season, I knew I wanted to coach rugby at the high school or college level while I was here. Luckily for me, Brookline HS was hiring a new head coach. I applied, did a virtual interview, was offered a second in person interview, and was officially offered the job in less than two weeks. The girls program was only two years old, and I saw that as a great opportunity for me to come in as a first time coach and transform the team into my own vision and something opponents find formidable. While I don't have a ton of coaching experience, I have plenty of playing experience and enthusiasm to grow the game.

To say I was nervous meeting the team for the first time would be an understatement. I knew that there were headstrong players on the team who had been there since day one that would challenge me, my new ideas, and my philosophies. And I know I have the tendency to come in hot with new ways of doing things that might go against the status quo, so I had to be deliberate in the way that I spoke and how I brought about change as to not elicite too much fight and push back. What I didn't want was to be someone the team feared/resented, didn't like, or enjoyed being around. And when you come into a group making changes without listening to what they have to say, that's exactly what happens. That was my first challenge; inviting change in a way that the players could get behind.

The first few weeks was all about finding my coaching voice while starting to build trust and a rapport with the team. Especially with the captains. I knew that if I could get the captains on board, the rest would follow. I wanted to be a demanding coach, not a demeaning one. That meant having high standards, setting them up to best achieve those standards, and encouraging them along the way. It wasn't always easy. There were plenty of times that I got frustrated and had to take a step back to collect myself. I was also extremely honest with them (maybe to a fault). From my experience level, owning up to my mistakes, and to the struggles I was facing in my own playing career. I think that in itself gained a lot of respect from the players. I showed them what it looked like to be upset but find other ways to deal with it than imploding, which carried over to how they treated each other. We never had any fights, never had players yelling or speaking negatively at each other. They worked through problems together, made an effort to support one another, and even started holding themselves to the standard I set out for them.

While we worked extremely hard, we made sure to have fun too. Because practice should be the highlight of these kids day. And if these kids (because that's what they are, high school kids) enjoy coming to practice, they will want to work hard for you, each other, and themselves. They will want to try their best, and that will get results. Not to mention creating this playful environment gets everyone to let their guard down and have interactions that build strong, healthy relationships. I truly believe this balance between hard work and play became the center of our teams culture and got them to trust me as a coach.

Don't get it twisted, I made mistakes and we lost games we could have won. That's to be expected. I told the team at least once a week "there's no such thing as a perfect rugby game." So why would I expect to be the perfect coach or have the perfect season? I had to learn a ton this season and I had to learn it quickly if I wanted to be the best version of myself for them.. Like how each athlete responded to different styles of coaching. Or how to create drills that would benefit all skill levels. I had to learn game management as coach. When to put finnishers in, how to talk to athletes coming off the pitch, when to hype them up vs when to calm them down. We had to bounce back from tough losses. We lost two matches to penalty trys on the last play (don't get me started on the reffing). That was really difficult to overcome, but we did it.

The title of this blog is "A Season Of Growth" for a reason. The amount of times I was told something along the lines of "they/we are so much better than last year" and from coaches, parents, and players is crazy. From where we started at the beginning of the season to where we finished, they played like a completely different, more experienced team. I distinclty remember losing our first game but seeing how proud they were of their performance, despite the outcome. I watched them impliment what we practice in games and develop more and more confidence over the course of the season. So many girls scored their first trys as seniors and that's extremely special. I watched as our captains found their voice and navigated leading their friends. I watched new players slowly integrate themselves into the fabric of our team and find ways to contribute. This season they expanded on the foundation of what this program will become.

We finished the regular season 3-3 and earned a spot in the semi-final playing against the number one seed. Unfortunately we lost, but that doesn't take away all that we achieved this season. We had 11 seniors this year, all of which played a critical role and will be hard to replace. As sad as it is that our season is over and to lose those players, as a coach I need to start preparing for next year. Meeting with returning players, recruiting athletes from other sports, and giving them off-season training options to put us in the best position possible going into the next season. The goal isn't to have one good season, it's to have multiple good seasons in a row and win a championship.

As for my coaching career, I'm more certain than ever that I will continue to coach long into my future. It was much more fulfilling than I expected and I want to continue growing and elevating the game. This summer I'll be coaching at the Polar Bear Rugby Camp with many who have coached me in the past. Continuing to develop and learn from highly experienced coaches to hopefully bring back to BHS. Because to be honest, I don't know where I'll be next spring. I hope I'm still in Boston playing for the Banshees, but my playing career is still up in the air and I have goals that I want to achieve and put first. A harsh reality but it's the truth. Either way, I'm going to do my best to keep building this program, and if need be, leave it better than I found it.